Menopause / Schmenopause
Dryness, bladder changes & intimacy.
The quieter symptoms matter too. Here is a gentle place to start, without awkwardness or judgement.
You are not imagining it.
Dryness, soreness, bladder changes and changes in sex can be part of peri- and postmenopause — but they can still feel surprising, isolating or difficult to say out loud.
This is common. It is also worth talking about.
You do not need to quietly put up with discomfort just because you are in this stage of life.
What can change
- Dryness, burning, itching or sorenessIn and around the vagina or vulva.
- Sex feeling uncomfortable or painfulSometimes because tissues feel drier, more sensitive or less stretchy than they used to.
- Bladder changesNeeding to wee more often, more urgently, overnight, or getting symptoms that feel like a UTI.
- A change in desire or confidenceSleep, stress, body changes, relationship dynamics and hormones can all affect how intimacy feels.
A gentle next step
- Name what is happeningUse the tracker notes or GP prep tool to record dryness, pain, bladder symptoms or recurring UTIs in your own words.
- Ask for a conversation, not a perfect explanationA GP, nurse, sexual-health clinic or pharmacist can talk through options that may help, including non-hormonal products and treatments that may be suitable for you.
- Take pressure off intimacyComfort, communication and consent matter. You are allowed to slow down, pause or say what you need.
When to get checked
Make a GP appointment if you have unusual discharge, spotting or bleeding, pain that is persistent or severe, pain when peeing, or recurrent UTI-type symptoms.
Bleeding after sex or after 12 months without periods should be checked rather than assumed to be menopause.